Due to his keen business skills and the colour of his skin he goes by the name of ‘Guru Presto” in our organization. After facing a mid-life crisis at age 13, Shivad realised that his purpose is to empower others to give off their best self to the world. Here is a man so passionate about education that he fears a Zombie Apocalypse purely because there will be no one left to teach.
The “Mildish Jalapeno”
We all know that one war veteran who wears bandannas, t-shirts with the sleeves cut-off and hates millennials. The young man above is the polar opposite of that person; and when he’s not trying to be the Indian Childish Gambino, he’s studying toward a BBusSci Economics at UCT.
Make no mistake, we don’t call these guys the dream team because they’ve been sleepin’ on the job, we call them the dream team because:
1. They’re everything you ever wanted to be as a kid.
2. It sounds really cool to say because it rhymes and
3. They also happen to be some of the country’s top performing students.
You must be a real dumb-ledore to not call this man a mathemagician. Liam will make your bad marks disappear faster than those fifteen minutes of reading time in an English exam disappear. However, he still manages to maintain an amazing humility and kindness to the rest of us muggles.
Lord of the Ringtones
As his title suggests, Satchen lives an awesome double life. On the one hand, he is very geeky and will play Warcraft and watch cat videos till the cows come home. But on the other hand, he is a badass member of an insanely cool band. More badass-ness can be seen in that he has a tattoo; more nerdiness can be seen in that it is of a Pokemon – a perfect picture of this complex being.
Vatman-The Mark Knight
This accounting superhero doesn’t only know accounting; he feels it rushing through him with every breath that he takes. He wakes up to sweet smells of debts waiting to be reconciled as he walks over to his cupboard to choose a t-shirt; he calls this cupboard his t-account. That was a little accounting joke, and if you didn’t catch it, you should probably buy the Presto Accounting Guide.
The Wolf of All Streets
Alka is a powerful weapon. The combination of vast business knowledge, coupled with her incredible nice-ness has propelled her far into our business… and into our hearts. Now before this gets way too emotional, we’ll just end off by saying that Alka is the best thing since low GI whole-wheat sliced bread.
The Phantom Menace to Low Marks
If you happened to be a collector of happy geniuses with a flair for adventure and deep thought, then Ben is an absolute must have. Established in 1995, Ben has been fine-crafted in the city of Johannesburg while still retaining the small-town appeal of such an easy-to-know personality. While stocks lasts. Terms and conditions apply.
Breaking Bad Marks
If Presto were like a salad and Dean were a fresh fruit or vegetable available at your nearest supermarket; he would be Lettuce. He would be that thing that is so integral to the formation of the team that if there were no lettuce in a salad, no Dean in Presto, one would probably just refuse to eat and call the salad a toss. Dean is also really good at wrestling Presto co-founder Shivad Singh.
The Passionate Physicist
Never before have we met someone who is so smart that even their biceps are made up of grey matter. Now you might be thinking; “that makes no sense, that defies the laws of physics”, and to that I reply “I have no idea, I’m just the guy who writes the biographies”. But you know who will know about the laws of physics, Bongi. He wrote them. All of them. While he was a fetus.
Plus he got a physics lab named after him. Oh, and he also met Oprah. Need I say more?
The Brains, the Braun and the Boerewors
If Harvard University had a bouncer, it would be Dylan. He is the perfect balance between a rugby superstar and a chemistry rockstar. Yes, rockstar. Because to Dylan, chemistry isn’t a science, it’s a performance where he does his thing and waits for a reaction. Pun Intended. Get it or get got yo